On Sunday, March 18th the annual auction to benefit aids research till be held at 6 p.m. at Casa Marina Hotel. I, along with the art community of Key West have donated one of my decoupage plates. I feel honored to be asked to be a part of this event as the artists of Key West are a mighty impressive bunch. I am in good company. Having attended this auction for several years I began to think about what makes a good auction?

An auction has the air of a cocktail party. Good auctions often begtin with drinks and nibbles, just enough to loosen everyone up and get them in the spirit of the event. The items being auctioned are displayed in a tasteful manner for all to preview and while everyone hopes to get a good deal, they are also mindful that this is a charity event. Whatever one bids, it is a win win situation. The artist has donated his or her work. The bidders help to raise the going prices and the successful bidder not only goes home with an original painting or sculpture but has given to a worthy cause. There are no losers at an auction.

I am a veteran auction-attendee. My entire house is furnished with auction finds,. Most items were purchased, or rather bid on and gotten or a steal. Nothing was purchased on impulse nor have I overpaid for anything. I consider myself a savvy auction goer, mostly because I’ve never had deep pockets and I usually go to the preview so I don’t find something horribly wrong with a piece once I get home. In other words, I have my limit to pay for something, and when I buy something that isn’t perfect, I know what I’m bidding on. Mostly I know exactly how much I am willing to spend and the feverish bidding by those around me on site does not get to me.

In the summertime I begin every day at an auction. I go because it is entertaining, not because I need anything, and most of the stuff at our auctions has some historical background, which is enlightening. It lets me know what things are worth, or at least what some vacationing fools will pay.

I have a lot of “foodie” friends. It is always fun to go to their houses because you know you’ll get a good meal without fuss. I do not call myself a cook and fall into the category of making my guests feel celebrated by how I set the table. My meals are simple and I disguise this fact with a lot of smoke and mirror. For me, the fun begins when I set the table. A beautiful table, whether for two or a crowd, sets the mood of the occasion. It’s easy to set a creative table with things you may already have around the house. One of my most successful tables to celebrate the arrival of spring, – and no, it doesn’t have to be more of a reason than that – is to line clear glass Mason jars down the middle of a bare table and fill each one with a cut spring flower. Using the flower colors as the theme of the table, it’s easy to dress up plain linen napkins by tying each one with grosgrain ribbon holding a small bud under the bow. Placemats can also reflect the color of the flowers. Plates should be white. So simple, so easy!

Everyone appreciates it when the hostess makes an occasion out of an invitation. When you arrive at someone’s home it should immediately feel festive. Living in two resort towns, I attend many get-togethers of all sorts. I go to fund raising events, holiday parties galore and dinner parties for ten as well as intimate dinner parties for four close friends. And I like to share my home with friends as well. My people have a knack for making even a casual meal, served in the kitchen, seem like a special occasion. Using the things we own is the key to entertaining with ease – making a beautiful table without pretension and without making the guests uncomfortable.

My decorator friend, Michael Pelkey once coined the word “tableicisous” as a way to describe a creation he did for a party. It’s just what the name implies, a delicious looking table. We once thought we’d do together with that title showing people how to look at things with a creative, sometimes playful, sometimes sophisticated eye. The idea was short-lived as we both got involved with other projects. One of our ideas was to create a centerpiece for an Easter brunch with a basketful of colorful balls of yarn, rather than the traditional dyed eggs. If you are a sewing enthusiast, you might use spools of thread in a sewing basket as a centerpiece. One of my newspaper columns at Christmas time received lots of positive responses when I told my readers to take out everything red in their homes and create little vignettes on table tops: it might be a group of red plastic mixing spoons in a white pitcher on the kitchen counter or a group of your child’s toys on the dining table for a playful theme. This might be an idea for an Easter table as well. Just use everything

For a publishing party to celebrate my Key West book, I covered a round outdoor table with lots and lots of leafy greens like spinach, kale and such that I got at the supermarket. I’m a big fan of using food creatively for table decorations. Once the table was completely covered I scooped out the centers of cabbage heads to hold various dips. Using green as my color scheme I filled a tall, glass vase with just one large Palm frond. At other times I’ve used oranges and lemons, kumquats and limes and cranberries at Christmas time in creative arrangements. The materials for setting a table are endless.

Aside from my own creative tables and those of my friends, I have access to many designers and flower arrangers and the people who design tables for catered affairs. Shells are a favorite for beach wedding themes. Rather than flowers, fill hurricane lamps with one large white candle in each and surround it with sand, then top the sand with a variety of shells. Scatter more shells and white votive candles around each one. The napkins can be tied with one shell and lovely sand-colored satin ribbons.

While many of us appreciate a beautifully set table who has the the time, or even desire to spend hours and lots of money creating table settings. That’s why I’m always looking for everyday items or things I have on hand that can be used in creative ways. It’s just a matter of looking at things in a new way and realizing that selective groupings lead to interesting table settings.

There is an area of entertaining that is appealing for today’s lifestyle that includes entertaining simply but elegantly: fabulous without fuss, wonderful with what you have, No one wants to make a career out of entertaining but when we do it’s fun to set a table with personality. It might be simply discovering a new way to fold napkins, or creative centerpieces from your own collectibles, combining different colors or new ideas for arranging a buffet table. The idea is to stretch your imagination beyond the obvious. Anyone can entertain in style.

I asked my friend Patrick if he’d found any good stuff lately? He’s an inveterate yard sale devotee as well as a dumpster diver. “The other day I bought an electric transformer,” he told me and described an item you could never find if you had gone in search of it. But that’s the fun of yard sales. Collecting seems to be an American passion. Everyone who likes to go antiquing, rummage around at a flea market, or scour the paper every Saturday for yard sale locations is probably not looking for anything they need. Most of us scroungers are simply hoping to uncover a treasure.

An innocuous ad for a yard sale makes two or three people I know positively salivate. Finding a teapot for two dollars that turns out to be Minton china spurs us on. What if the next time it’s an original painting by a well-known artist and overnight you’ve won the equivalent of the lottery? Some people were born to it, this rummaging around for those “things” that speak to us on some deep level. Others of course look for bargains, or that certain something they weren’t looking for but must have once it’s found. Buying can be an obsession for some and just plain fun for most of us. Patrick totally ignores the “Absolutely No Early Birds” statement in a yard sale ad and claims that if anyone objects he just waits patiently. He often regales us with anecdotes about the interactions that go on among yard sale attendees and the sale givers, each haggling within the protocol of good yard sale manners. Once in awhile someone crosses that line and forgets that the idea of a yard sale is to get rid of things. My friend JoAnn has become her own interior decorator in true Key West fashion, pulling perfectly good things from trash cans to supplement her rental house. She’s giving Debra Yates some competition in this arena. There are many folks around town who have become experts at spotting things, perfectly useful things, put out on the curb for others to take. I once called Michael Pelkey to tell him about a headboard I spotted on the curb on Olivia Street. It hadn’t been there ten minutes but Michael said. “Saw it. Not worth the effort.” And that was that. Evaluation made, item rejected, – A sign of a real “Junktique Pro”.

A walk down Duval Street proves something about the buying patterns of people on vacation. Americans love to shop. We buy souvenirs to remind us of the places we’ve been. We buy gifts. We buy art and we buy particularly unusual or beautiful items we may not see elsewhere. The pursuit of a collectible is as much fun as the acquisition itself and, if one isn’t careful, can lead to obsessive behavior. Who among us doesn’t know someone crazy for something?

Things that people choose to collect may have interesting historic backgrounds, they may be especially well designed or they may continue to increase in monetary value because of their rarity. And then there are things that challenge the imagination, like those front yard appliances disguised as “art.” For whatever reason, there is never a dearth of collectibles or people who want to collect them.

Accidental Collections

Many collections started by accident. Perhaps you bought a Toby mug at a flea market, then another at a yard sale and now you find yourself looking for Toby mugs wherever you go A collection can start with anything that attracts your interest for whatever reason.

Piece By Piece

A collection is usually not purchased as a whole, but rather collected piece by piece. That’s part of the allure. First you have the experience of finding a new piece and then you have the experience of seeing it displayed with the rest of the collection. There is no end to the number you can add. Each piece is a reminder of a different time or place where the item was purchased.

Personalized Collection

A collection is an individual and personal statement. Sometimes a collection is visited upon the unsuspecting. My husband’s uncle had the misfortune of being nicknamed “Bunny.” Need I say more? Everyone knew exactly what to give him for Christmas and birthdays. He had glass bunnies, ceramic bunnies, stuffed bunnies, large and miniature bunnies. And because they were gifts he could never give any of them away.

Collections To Consider

l. Oversized crocks filling a niche of shelves.

2. Black and white photographs of family members grouped and hung on one wall. Betsy Smith did this in her bathroom.

3. Baskets hanging from a rafter or beam, or lined up on a bench or shelf always within easy access for practical uses.

5. Michael Pelkey collects ironstone pitchers and yellow or white pudding molds. Check out the pictures in my new book, “Key West: A Tropical Lifestyle” (Monacelli Press).

6. Quilts on beds, as wallhangings, tablecloths, over a sofa or chair. Damaged quilts can be cut up to make fabulous pillows covers.

7. Early Key West memorabilia framed all together on one wall or arranged on a small table.

8. Carefully arranged books filling an entire wall as the focal point of an otherwise stark and uncluttered room. Great for the soul!

9. A collection of shells in a rustic basket on a table is simple and lovely. Their different shades of natural colors, shapes and patterns together create a work of art as nice as any you could buy.

10 Key West art, if you’re into collecting for the possibility of long-term increased value.

Once you’ve chosen the date of your wedding and secured a place for the reception one of the first things you do is to choose your wedding invitation. This is an important part of the process and once you see your names together in print the reality and finality of this momentous occasion becomes more real. All the invitations are sent out and what happens to them? Yours may go into your wedding album but wouldn’t it be nice to preserve it and to have on view all the time?

I’ve been designing decoupage plates for more than thirty years, first for Tiffany and Cartier in New York and then Bergdorf Goodman and finally through my own shop on Nantucket. I’ve designed hundreds of wedding invitation plates and each is unique.  People who give them as gifts and those who receive them say they appreciate something handmade that is original. Some of the prettiest plates that I’ve designed are for weddings taking place on Nantucket because I usually surround the wedding invitation with Hydrangeas. There is nothing so lovely as a hydrangea blue blossom to symbolize the island. Another favorite flower for a June wedding is roses when they are in bloom and climbing over the little houses in ‘Sconset. Calla lilies are especially nice for a modern wedding with their clean green and white color scheme. I’ve done some very unusual designs over the years. (se Wedding Plates Section) One couple included a Count and another was for a couple getting married in Greece and another in a Scottish castle. Many people want the flowers to represent the area, or the time of year. Christmas roses or berries are popular for holiday weddings, leaves for a New England wedding in the fall, and sometimes the bride’s favorite flower or color relates to the design of the wedding invitation itself. The time of year, the typeface, the formality or casual design of the invitation, the colors, all dictate the design direction and it is a most creative challenge, but the end product is uniquely yours. . All the work is done on the underside of a clear glass plate and backed with handmade papers. Then it is sealed on the back so the plate can be washed by hand, but most couples hang it on the wall or display it on a stand. This is a gift that a couple often gives to their parents as well. But the best compliment of all is when the recipients receive the plate as a gift and later order the same gift for all their friends who are getting married.

If you are planning a  Fourth of July party here are some entertaining tips:

1.Flags make the perfect patriotic decoration with a spin. Wrap them around throw pillows and simply pin at the back. Or wrap the pillows with red and white or blue and white checked fabric, even dishtowels.

2. Use red, white and blue ribbons to edge painted boxes, flower pots, or placemats as well as using the more elaborate, wire-edged ribbons for curtain tie backs.

3. If you sew, use those little flags that come on poles, remove, wash the sizing out of the fabric and stitch the little flags together to make a table cover. I like to quilt flags. It’s a cinch to stitch along the stripes and around each star. While some people might think this is an irreverent nod to our American flag I think of it as a rather patriotic gesture.

4. Here’s another party idea using flags, I borrowed the idea from a birthday party I attended last year. String little American flags on a clothesline and hang from tree to tree over your deck or patio for a July 4^th barbecue. Or, use a large flag as a tablecover.

5. Here’s the lazy person’s way to set a 4^th of July table. Assemble everything you have on hand that is red, white and blue and make a centerpiece arrangement with those items that work together. For example, you might fill a blue bowl with balls of red yarn, red cherries, red apples or flowers from the garden.

6. If you have small children, make a grouping of small toys down the middle of the table.

7. Sand pails are good for holding napkins for a buffet. Use checked dishtowels for oversized napkins for a buffet. For a messy meal such as ribs, use red, white and blue washcloths for napkins and when the meal is finished toss in the wash.

8. Group potted red geraniums in the center of the table and tie them together with a wide red, white and blue ribbon..

9. A quilt makes a wonderful tablecloth in patriotic colors.

10 Consider dying hardboiled eggs to fill a bowl.  Use the eggs as place cards with a name on each one. Use a wax crayon to mark a name on the egg before dipping it into food dye.

11, Marbleize the eggs by wrapping elastic bands this way and that around the hard boiled eggs. Mix a few drops of food color into a glass filled with boiling water and a spoonful of vinegar. Leave until color is intense enough, removing the egg with a spoon to check now and then. Once dry, remove the elastic bands to reveal the marbleized pattern left where the dye did not take. Kids will love doing this with you. Once the party’s over make egg salad. It’s the perfect way to recycle. Have a happy and safe 4^th!

Several years ago I proposed a book title, “Leslie Linsley’s Cheap, Cheaper, Cheapest: Decorating with Fabulous Knockoffs” to my literary agent. I am known for “good design at reasonable prices” and this new book was to be about getting the most value for your money by choosing the best-designed items for every room in your home at a cost anyone could afford. For example, if one needs a lamp, one of the best selections of all-purpose, well-designed lamps can be found through the Restoration Hardware catalog. Their lamps, designed to work in any room, come in a variety of classic styles and in different heights. They cost in the $300. dollar range. However, every year in September the company offers them at discount for around 25-35% off the original cost. At little over $200. dollars they represent a good buy. If this is still more than one wants to spend, you can find cheaper lamps of similar design and lesser quality for under $100. dollars at Home Depot. It may not look quite as good, but good enough and still well-designed for the price. If that is still an extravagant purchase, you can buy really good replacement shades for existing lamps for around twenty dollars and your lamps will look refreshed.

The point of the book was to tell readers how to find the best designs in all areas of home furnishings, how much they cost, where to find really good copies of each of these items, how much they cost and then offering yet another option for a great knock-off at a fraction of the cost. This was not to be a comparison-shopping guide but rather a book of strategies for getting the look at a comfortable price point. Even with my track record of over 60 published books, thirty-two publishers turned down the proposal.  Most of them expressed the point of view that surely the economy was not quite as dire as predicted and was about to spike upward. We know it didn’t.  By all accounts from many of my suppliers of home furnishing goods the economy, at least in New England is getting better. Their wholesale sales are up from two years’ ago and this is a positive thing to hear.

That said,  it is a fact – our economic situation has affected everyone, even those with high income status. It has become extremely fashionable to be money savvy. Finding ways to keep the status quo by using clever ways to do what we always took for granted in a more economical way has become a source of pride. Everyone likes to live well, to have a nice home and to decorate it with style and taste. But this may not be possible for the majority of Americans. Everyone knows that beyond basic furnishings such as a bed, something to sit on and a table, we don’t have to buy home furnishings. But over the last decade we’ve been exposed through the media and the fabulous stores and homes on the island to beautiful things and many of us have attempted to decorate our rooms like the pages of the magazines we admire. Quite simply, we have a desire to keep our homes looking good. There is always a shabby sofa that needs replacing or a room that could use a coat of paint

My readers have always expressed interest in ideas for decorating well for less so I will continue to dispense good house ideas that get the look without breaking the bank.  For example, an authentic early American blanket chest with original milk paint finish costs around $3500. This is the sort of item one finds in antique shops and from American folk art dealers. A reproduction chest looks quite similar-if one is not an expert in folk art- and will cost around a thousand dollars. And then there are copies of the reproductions that cost approximately $300-$500. This item is also available in unfinished pine from a ready-to-finish mill store for approximately $150. dollars. Almost anyone can stain or apply a milk paint finish to make this item look decent, and for this bargain it’s practical, good looking and functions in the same way as the original.

It’s amazing how removing an inexpensive but well-designed item from its environment immediately elevates it, especially if you surround it with better items.

Decorator’s Trick: A decorator I know furnished his house with very expensive, designer furniture. It is a spare, minimalist approach, therefore each accessory was carefully chosen. He found an inexpensive piece of pottery at Pier I Imports for $5. dollars and placed it on an antique table. That piece of pottery was instantly elevated to the status of good art, as no one would expect such a cheap item on an expensive table.

Sometimes the inexpensive copies are made as cheaply as the price suggests. However, an informed buyer can usually pick up on this pretty quickly. Good design prevails and it will be copied, sometimes forever. So, buy the best you can afford and use it until it can be replaced with better quality. The trick is not to overdo it so “cheap” defines the room.

Given budget restraints and a modicum of good taste, it can be an exciting challenge to come up with clever ideas and innovative solutions to decorating problems. Getting the hang of it can be most satisfying.

I’ve been living on Nantucket for most of my life and am very used to the rather laid-back pace that comes with the territory. This becomes even more evident every time I leave to spend a couple of days in the Boston store. But a couple of weeks ago I had an old childhood friend come for the weekend. She’s lived in California for as long as I’ve lived on Nantucket and all weekend long I kept thinking she was on speed. She wasn’t of course, but the train she was on was running a lot faster than mine. I’m aware how everyone talks or writes, or texts or emails in shorthand. I admit, I multitask like everyone else since there are always way too many things to deal with in a day than there are waking hours, but things have gotten out of hand.

A woman came into my shop and we got to talking about summer rentals. I asked if she’d checked V-R-B-O, in long-hand that translates to Vacation Rental By Owner. “Oh Verbo, sure” she said, shortening the name even further. I thought about this. Four syllables for V, R, B, O when two would do. Made sense to me. I like the idea of editing…. To a point,  I do not like it when I get a text message that requires a call to a five year old for translation. And I do admit that I only hire young employees for the simple reason that I am basically technnologically lazy. It’s so easy to hand the phone to my assistant and ask her to program in my most called numbers than actually do it myself. But then when some of them become obsolete I haven’t a clue as to how to delete them. And this is why I will never join Facebook, because my BFFs, will be on there forever even long after I can’t remember who the heck they are.

Given that I am basically an impatient personality type it baffles me to know that I do any craftwork whatsoever let alone decoupage. This is a craft that takes a great deal of patience. It literally slows down the world and chunks of time are gobbled up. But I have watched many super hyper employees become docile lambs after a week of cutting out intricate botanical prints. This just might be a major medical break-through for curing ADD.  At the very least, I know that crafting relieves stress, it helps to stay on a diet (you can’t eat as much when you are crafting) and the results are satisfying. Not a bad return on such a minor investment!

I live on two islands. Nantucket Island has been my home for forty years and for twenty or so years I’ve spent two months in Key West. I know Key West, as an outsider, but recognize the familiar problems this island has in common with my island. Both islands lack affordable housing, suffer from seasonal traffic, no parking spaces and extra strains on the infrastructure of these fragile places.

While in Key West, my partner and I strode down to the Afterdeck at Louies’ to unwind from the pressures of finding ourselves – a writer and photographer – in the most unaccustomed position of having no assignment. Leisure time is not our forte and we have been working on this attitude adjustment for two months. A Louis’ Passion and a Marguerita at sunset have been contributing greatly toward successful achievement of this goal.

It was five thirty. Ten minutes into our self-imposed regimen we were joined by a local character, Dink Bruce, a regular raconteur familiar to most everyone here. His friend Reef soon joined us.

Our conversation turned to the subject of gentrification found in so many resort areas that, once discovered became overly populated. Dink was in rare form and ever quick with an analogy of the island said,  “Consider this island as the result of a good recipe, Visitors come and enjoy the meal but find they must alter it a bit to suit their personal tastes. So they fiddle with it a bit and clean it up, so to speak. Before you know it they’ve put in too much of this and taken out too much of that and the original recipe is no longer discernable.” Reef, a thirty seven year veteran of Key West picked up the thread, “When you hear the word ‘gentrification; it sounds positive. But if you think about it in the context of change it can mean something totally different. In fact, for us it is quite negative.” Our talk became lively with Dink taking side trips to imitate various characters he’d encountered.

The folks who came to live here so many years ago liked the laid-back nature of the place. Everyone is familiar with its appeal to artists and writers and free-thinking sorts. Today the prevailing attitude is accepting of any number of off-beat factions. It is this diversity of opinion that makes up the fabric of the island and encourages lively conversation at dinner parties. “But we are a dying breed,” said Reef and once the old timers go the island won’t be the same.”

This got me thinking about Nantucket’s gentrification, about ten years ahead by comparison. I commented on how much good had come out of the gentrification of our island in the form of improved services such as the hospital and improvements to the economy in general. But I had to admit gentrification had gotten way out of hand verging on the sterilization of our island. It’s hard to keep things a bit rough around the edges, the very sorts of things that lend character to the place. For example, in Nantucket our charming small houses are being replaced by bigger and fancier dwellings and the charm of our island is being eroded. Suburbia is creeping in. This is happening more slowly in Key West because there isn’t any land left to build on. However, there is more to gentrify here and so it will take a longer time. But this brings me back to the meaning of “gentrify”, a word that sounds pretty okay and so we often dismiss it as not being particularly threatening the way a more odious and contagious disease might alert us into preventive action.

According to Wikipedia, gentrification refers to the process in which low cost, physically deteriorated neighborhoods experience physical renovations and an increase in property value along with an influx of increasingly wealthier residents who typically displace the prior residents. Proponents of gentrification usually focus on the monetary values and benefits.

Artistic and subcultural thinkers often seek out places because of their low prices and their sense of authenticity or “grit”. As the artistic or once “bohemian” character of the area grows, it appeals to “consumers”. Eventually those sporadic consumers edge out the earlier arrivals for a number of reasons, most obviously being “no longer affordable” and lack of “grit.” Locals can’t afford to live in the community and long established businesses close making way for the homogenous chains that can afford the newly risen real estate prices. Places like Nantucket and Key West have a unique style formed by their longtime residents. As newcomers displace these residents, ideas about what is attractive change, and standards for architecture, landscaping and public behavior change as well. Quite literally the people “of gentle birth” have more influence on the place and, over time, the very character that attracted them in the first place disappears.  At first the changes are slow, but at a certain point in time an ever-expanding number of newcomers find the place acceptable for their comfort level.

Is there a solution to the problems that arise from gentrification? Maybe through social awareness. But then how does a community go about policing the rate of gentrification that is acceptable in a free society? This will probably be a subject of concern here for a very long time.

When people travel to other parts of the country and beyond it is their habit to shop for items that remind them of their travels, or perhaps the things they can’t find at home. Tourists buy everything from t-shirts to souvenirs. It’s easy to mock those who flock to souvenir shops for anything sporting the name of the place they are visiting – until we find ourselves doing the same thing. This is the situation I found myself in during a trip to Florence, Italy.

When I travel anywhere I’m more attracted to flea markets than the shops. The timing for a trip to France several years ago was planned around market days in several different towns, including two consecutive Saturdays, coming and going, at a flea market unrivaled by any I’ve been to in thirty years of scrounging.

What makes a flea market find more interesting than newly purchased items is the serendipity factor. The process of finding the unknown is quite special. It’s usually something we weren’t looking for, but at the moment of discovery it is endowed with qualities it may or may not have had.  For flea market aficionados (in antique parlance “pickers”), that item becomes particularly meaningful. It has survived the process of previous picking through lots of “junk” and deemed to be the pearl. Perhaps it was purchased with a bit of clever haggling, and a feeling of satisfaction unlike that of our country’s early gold diggers.  Once we take the item out of its environment it becomes even more valuable to us. We reflect on our good fortune for having discovered it and the item often becomes more unique by virtue of ownership.

It was with these feelings of expectation that I approached a little flea market of sorts in Florence. It was made up of individual shops, more like rows of attached lean-to’s selling mostly lighting fixtures and chandeliers, in need of repair and thus, frightfully overpriced.  It was here at stall #15, identified with a numbered tile, that I first spotted them – the ceramic doorknobs that I hoped would adorn my new office doors.  They were oval with softly curved edges from years of use. Their once white color was now discolored and aged to a soft cream. The underside had a slight curve that, when grabbed fit one’s hand so it felt right and you noticed this. There were 4 sets and I needed 3, but I wasn’t sure we could get the mechanical parts needed to make them work at home. Besides they were more costly than I wanted to spend. But I coveted them.  I didn’t buy them on that day, or the day after, or the day after that, although I kept going back to see if they were still there. I dreamed about them and romanticized where they had once resided. I was obsessed with those doorknobs,  On the second Monday all the vendors were closed. The next day it rained and #15 was closed on the three excursions I took to the place. We checked the prices and availability of new knobs in a hardware store. They were cheaper but didn’t compare -too white, too perfect, too American.

I went back again and asked, “Quanto costa?”. Then how much less for three?  We communicated on a calculator, she punching in her obstinate figures, me with a come-back. There was no give. I left  determined to win this waiting game, sure that I could out stay her. Days passed and I couldn’t stop thinking about the knobs. If they were sold, I told myself, it wasn’t meant to be. If they were still there (and they probably had been for years, but that is something the “stalker” never wants to think about) I would buy them at whatever the cost and forget about it in the scheme of things.

The three sets of knobs are now in my home. I paid full price. They are even more beautiful on this side of the world than they were when I first spotted them, rusting, dripping from rain, thrown upon a heap of tools, locks and assorted non-descript items.

I like to imagine they were once on some massive wooden doors in a 15th century villa, similar to the one in which we stayed. Every time I open the French doors to my office the knobs feel good in my hands. Imagining where their existence started and is ending and how they were found among the detritus of everyday Italian households is somehow symbolic. I have taken home a piece of Florence to add to the enjoyment of my home here.

The photographs we took with Michelangelo’s David looming behind us, another in the Duomo, at the Uffizi, of the Pitti Palace and Boboli Gardens, fill our photo album.  We looked at them from time to time and then hardly at all. We have many purchases that somehow got misplaced or used up but, I am reminded of this trip many times over as I slide my hand over those doorknobs every single day.

This morning I sat at the kitchen counter pouring over one of the myriad of home catalogs that arrive daily. I was looking for a shelving unit and came upon what I thought would be perfect. Made of chrome it looked sturdy enough to hold the plates I had in mind. The dimensions were just right for my space, but the clincher was the words, “Easy assembly, no tools required.” My life has always been one of “assembly required”. It doesn’t matter what I do, it seems to be more labor-intense than the finished project warrants no matter what it is. So, I was relieved to find a product offering instant gratification. At least that’s what I thought as I dialed the 800 number, credit card in hand. (I like to make personal contact when ordering anything.) Not so easy. Upon second examination of the description, I found that there was too much space between the shelves, which would have been fine had I wanted it to hold books or large items, but totally wasted for holding flat plates.

While I was put on hold I noticed the copy said the shelves were adjustable in one-inch increments. The operator (or rather, “sales associate”) was most helpful when I asked if I could order extra shelves and trotted off to wherever they go to find out if this was possible. The Musak was pleasant enough and her southern accent, when she returned, made the answer more palatable. “We don’t have the number of the manufacturer and therefore can’t ask the question. Perhaps you can find it on the Internet.” I thanked her and immediately lost interest in the project. So it seems that “minimum assembly required” is fine if all things are perfect. I consoled myself with the knowledge that assembling the parts was not going to be so easy after they were spread out on my living room floor and probably a screw or some essential part would be missing and, contrary to stated myth, a tool was indeed needed and it was not included and not an item carried at my local hardware store because the product is made somewhere other than the U.S. Worst of all, the instructions undoubtedly would be written in Japanese or Chinese.

I am more comfortable with “Assembly Required” when I’m familiar with a product or a process. This is the current slogan for the Craft and Hobby Association, of which I am a member. They are most surely under the misguided assumption that there is a world of do-it-yourselfers out there that actually respond in a positive way to this sort of challenge. On a basic level I understand this way of thinking. It’s the way I’ve lived my entire life, a curse passed down to me by my mother and my grandparents. If I can do it myself it gets done, if I have to call someone else to do it, it doesn’t.  Those who like to jump in and get your hands dirty know what I’m talking about. We don’t have to have any life experience with the task we’re about to tackle, but on some base level we have confidence that we can figure it out. This is fine with most things, but assembling an item that comes in a zillion pieces with directions written in a foreign language is not. Parents of small children know this better than anyone from pulling Christmas Eve all-nighters.

If the do-it-yourself approach is what makes you tick than you’re pretty much stuck with it. You’re lucky and cursed at the same time. It takes a concerted effort to turn this attitude around if you are so determined.  For example, taking the shelf incident, most people would find the shelving unit that came closest to suiting their needs and order it. But the “assembly required” person looks for ways to make things difficult, if only on a subconscious level. We look at a product that might serve to make our lives easier and then go about the business of thinking how it could work better. Most of the people I know are like this because they are born of a creative nature and thrive on problem-solving, whether they know it or not. We simply can’t accept life on a simple, need–to-know basis. .

Sometimes household problems are solved in unusual ways resulting in an interesting outcome because the obvious is not all that exciting for the do-it-yourselfer. For example, in a “call in someone” household, a badly stained wooden floor would be professionally sanded and re-polyurethaned. In our house it gets painted and sponged or spattered or stenciled because we know how to do that and the obvious and easiest solution isn’t always as appealing. The problem with the do-it-yourself approach is that it takes a long time to solve the problem.

Buy it or make it? That is the question. Do-it-yourself or get someone to do it for you?  Fixing a squeaky door, planting a garden, ,painting walls, caulking tile,, redecorating, refinishing an old dresser, fixing a drain pipe, hanging curtains – any one of a hundred things can seem like a nightmare or a creative challenge. Maybe a little do-it-yourself and a little let-someone-else-do it is the best of both worlds. For now I’m stuck with “assembly required”.